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jesusfreaklplj
Posts:19
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| 03/31/2011 3:29 PM |
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Hi everybody!! I had another accnt. but for some reason I couldn't log in lol. Been forever since I've posted anything. So...anyway...hears my question. I'm 14(bout to be 15) and I LOVE GOD with all I am, and I do my all to live for him, and pray that he lives and loves through me  . So....I do have a girlfriend(she's 15 bout to be 16) and from what I've read on here, me, at my age, having a girlfriend will be frowned upon. But, we are both love god, and help eachother with certain issues. She's like my best friend, someone whom I know I can go to when I need help, but will also be on my same level. So...my question is, if it's a relationship based entirely on god, why is it so bad?? P.S. We had our parents approval before I asked her to be my girlfriend. |
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Nicole
Posts:552
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| 03/31/2011 4:48 PM |
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Well hi jesusfreaklplj! Nice to have you back on.
Haha I take it you read our posts about dating ages? Well, just to reiterate my point: I personally think the dating age for girls should be around 16-17 at the youngest. For guys... the expert was Will. That being said, I don't think anyone of us said we disapprove of a relationship based entirely on God. I bet if you asked Jo, Will (wjr1991), Clare, Rose, Beckah, or myself- we'd absolutely ENCOURAGE a relationship based on God. I'll take it further and say it's the best way to go.
Jesusfreak, while I had my personal opinions on dating ages, they mostly have to do with age maturity. Since I'm a girl.... teen girls don't have the same maturity level as most college age girls. While both age categories have the similar mentality that we're invincible- nothing bad can happen to us- teen girls are more prone to act rashly than girls much older than they are. Hey, with age comes experience, or wisdom for some.  Okay, now what I said about dating and ages, these are all my personal opinions. Ask anyone else and they may or may not have the same opinion. Some people think once you enter highschool it's totally fine to date. The ultimate authority I'd go by is your parents. Hey, if you're parents and her parents approve of you guys dating- that's wonderful! My opinion definitely doesn't take the place of your parents' approval.
Granted, some people are very mature for their age, like beyond the average maturity level for their age category. There are a lot of examples here on the forums.
Anyways, sorry Jesusfreaklplj if I sounded like I had miffed attitude while writing this. I wasn't going for that. But please, do be careful what you say; that part about a relationship based on God being bad- if you read carefully what we said about dating and ages, none of us mentioned ANYTHING about a relationship being based on God a bad thing. If anything, it's what we encouraged- and I hope I'm not stepping on anyones toes when I said that. Let me know if I spoke out of turn  |
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whenever you find yourself on the side of the majority, it's time to pause and reflect -Mark Twain |
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jesusfreaklplj
Posts:19
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| 03/31/2011 5:11 PM |
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| Thanks for the reply! I completely understand about the maturity topic. Tho, we never have time alone together, so pretty much we're just best friends until we're allowed to date |
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JoJo
Posts:1670
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| 03/31/2011 9:53 PM |
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it's not exactly a bad thing... we just discourage it because most people that age aren't really in a head/heart/God space to handle one haha.
My first comment would be, if your parents approved, I see no problem with it and I will say good on you 2 for including them etc and handling it so well |
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Turn up the music
Turn it up loud
Take a few chances
Let it all out
'Cause you won't regret it
Lookin' back from where you have been
'Cause it's not who you knew
And it's not what you did
It's how you live
.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.
God Bless!
Mwah XOXO
JoJo |
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jesusfreaklplj
Posts:19
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| 03/31/2011 10:29 PM |
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| Not only did our parents approve, but also, ALL our friends approved, my best friend(he's like my big bro), my youth pastor's, and her youth pastor. So, we had ALOT of possitive imput about our relationship. Plus, we have both came through the same kind of difficulties with god's help, so we're able to help incourage eachother. Also, neither of us want to be like most kids we see...having a new boyfriend/girlfriend each week. We both want a lasting relationship. Plus, she lives like 30 miles away so we hardly get a chance to hang, so theres not much of a chance for us to do anything we shouldnt! so that helps too |
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jesusfreaklplj
Posts:19
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| 04/01/2011 12:10 AM |
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| Btw, im luke I was the one that started "Jesus is my.....??" |
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JoJo
Posts:1670
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| 04/01/2011 2:40 AM |
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oh ok cool  hehe
yeah, see... so you've pretty much sussed out the right way to do things at a young age, which IS A GOOD THING haha.
wish I'd have been that sensible when I was your age, but I was sooooo boy crazy... it wasn't even funny... and Will might suggest that i haven't grown out of it, but I have haha.
but yes. not that I actually had a bf at that age but I was obsessed with this one guy, who actually gets married soon, haha but I've so moved on saince 7+years ago i figured out I liked him just cuz he was my bestie's bro... and that was a stupid reason |
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Turn up the music
Turn it up loud
Take a few chances
Let it all out
'Cause you won't regret it
Lookin' back from where you have been
'Cause it's not who you knew
And it's not what you did
It's how you live
.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.
God Bless!
Mwah XOXO
JoJo |
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Beckah
Posts:903
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| 04/01/2011 4:11 PM |
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| wow! sounds like you have your head on straight and have a good head start on your relationship with this girl. |
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"Check yourself before you wreck yourself" |
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jesusfreaklplj
Posts:19
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| 04/01/2011 4:44 PM |
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| Thanks!!! I really care alot about her....and I just wanna make sure we're doin this right. |
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Beckah
Posts:903
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| 04/01/2011 5:14 PM |
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| well it sure sounds like it!! good luck! |
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"Check yourself before you wreck yourself" |
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jesusfreaklplj
Posts:19
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| 04/01/2011 5:23 PM |
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| Thank you! |
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clare
Posts:952
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| 04/01/2011 11:22 PM |
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| Wow, as long as the relationship is based on God and you have your parents approval that is great!! My only other question, do think you two will make it 5 yrs until you can get married?? I see so many young couples trying to date at 14, 15, and 16, and when I ask if they are willing to date that same person for 5 years until they can get married, and no one else, they usually stop and then go, no way!!! If you do date that long, will you be able to remain physically pure? |
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jesusfreaklplj
Posts:19
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| 04/01/2011 11:39 PM |
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| Yes to everything I believe we can last that long. And, I really care alot for her...so I can wait , besides, ive managed to stay pure this long, why ruin it now?? btw Congrats on you and Grant!! |
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Nicole
Posts:552
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| 04/02/2011 3:43 AM |
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Haha it seems like you've got your feedback Jesusfreak, or Luke, I wish I had your mentality when I was your age on dating. I wasn't interested in dating at your age, granted, but I don't think my maturity level was like that at that age- least about dating. I got baptized when I was 15 though.
Anyway, I think you're on the right track! While I find it true that most couples in high school nowadays don't survive relationships in the following 5 years or so, there are the exceptions. I know one couple in my high school class- back when I was in high school- who started dating in our sophomore year, and they're still together, and super cute I might add, 6 years later. And I still get to talk to them.
Anyways Luke, I hope the best works out for you and this girl |
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whenever you find yourself on the side of the majority, it's time to pause and reflect -Mark Twain |
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jesusfreaklplj
Posts:19
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| 04/02/2011 8:20 AM |
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| Thank you! |
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Beckah
Posts:903
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| 04/02/2011 5:19 PM |
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| Your welcome. |
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"Check yourself before you wreck yourself" |
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cassie14
Posts:68
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| 04/05/2011 6:26 PM |
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| @jesusfreaklplj i dont think your to young to date im the same age and it helps because through break-ups and heart-breaks it makes a stronger better person! and it helps you know what kind of person you would like to spend the rest of your life with! hope that helped a lil bit and especially if your both tryin to serve God your fine in my opinion |
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*judge no one* |
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Nicole
Posts:552
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| 04/05/2011 8:31 PM |
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No disrespect or anything to Cassie, but I have to disagree with the break ups and heart breaks. :/I don't claim to have credibility in this area, but In my honest opinion, I think break ups and heart breaks are in a sense setting you up for disaster in the end. If you break up and break up when things just don't work out, how is that setting you up for dealing with marriage problems you're going to have in the future? At least if plan to date and make it serious.
Granted, you might gain a little more wisdom, but it's hard to pick broken pieces of the heart once their shattered. Least that's my take.
Anyone else want to disagree or back me up? |
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whenever you find yourself on the side of the majority, it's time to pause and reflect -Mark Twain |
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clare
Posts:952
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| 04/05/2011 9:05 PM |
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| yeah breakup can make you stronger..BUT it there will always be a piece of you you'll never have back. I've been through a few break ups, all ending badly and I tell you they did not make me stronger! In fact, it made me weaker. I still have hurt, and there are pieces of my heart I'll never have back... |
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JoJo
Posts:1670
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| 04/06/2011 7:35 AM |
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yeah, this boarders on the topic of soul ties... and the less soul ties you have, the better off you'll be for your marriage, and less baggage to sort through...
trust me, been there, done that... i mean most of you know my story...
I'm quite sure that now, I just want to only like the man who'll one day be my husband... and I mean seriously like, not like a stupid passing crush... cuz I've had so much heartbreak that I'm so over it... I dont think I can emotionally handle them well... gosh I was depressed for like 6 months after the last one... and this guy, even though I've minimised contact and can mostly still be friends without much issues, I think he still has a piece of my heart, and sometimes I wish things were different... but i guess thats what happens when you think he's the guy you'll marry... just to cut a long story short... |
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Turn up the music
Turn it up loud
Take a few chances
Let it all out
'Cause you won't regret it
Lookin' back from where you have been
'Cause it's not who you knew
And it's not what you did
It's how you live
.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.
God Bless!
Mwah XOXO
JoJo |
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